my husband suffers from Premature Ejaculation and I don’t know how to tell him that he doesn’t satisfies me, I don’t want to hurt his feelings but if I keep on faking when i’m with him I don’t know what will happen.
How do I tell him that he needs to seek treatment without hurting his feelings????
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Just speak up but be very gentle. Almost ANY guy will get depressed upon hearing this. But it is critical that you communicate your needs to him. DO NOT wait until you can’t stand him anymore.
Nobody- neither men nor women- like to hear they are not good lovers. Part of our ego, I guess.
I agree with many answers….The worst thing you can do is what you have been doing already: lying and misleading him. It would have been easier to deal with this at the very beginning, when people are new at sex and before a routine establishes.
Now it will be harder to talk about this, because he will feel both betrayed (as in “lied to”) and also as a less-than-able lover…I would suggest you go to a therapist so you can talk about this without fighting and without hurting each other. Words spoken in anger can cause a lot of damage; so be smart and also be careful !
Buy a couple of good books, too. Knowledge is power…and if you can look at the books together and learn about how men’s and women’s bodies are built differently, so you can understand each other better, your relationship can improve.
Good luck.
I don’t fake with my husband and I think doing it would be a huge mistake. He needs to know if he’s not pleasing you. I tell my husband in plain English if I orgasm or not and if I want him to do anything more for me if I hadn’t. He’s smart enough to know that I won’t have one every time and its not because he’s a bad lover. There are other ways to please a woman than just sex, so tell your husband and let him try one of the other ways until he gets his problem dealt with.
One you either just tell him and then get help together for it. Or just try to find out on your own ways to help him. If you do tell him it will crush him forever and he may not get over it. If he finds out you faked it all this time it could end your marriage. Guys die when they find this stuff out. His confidence will die and even with help he may not 100% recover from the fact that you were not honest in the beginning. Do some research and see if you can learn ways to to help him last longer and help your self out along the way. This part of marriage is very important yet takes up the least amount of time to accomplish so do not let it destroy your marriage. Get a good hand help shower head..LOL
There are a lot of ways in which a man can satisfy a woman that don’t involve lengthy intercourse. Figure out what works best for you, and guide him. You don’t have to tell him “you suck in bed”, but you can always let him know what feels good or what gets you there. Touching, kissing, oral – it’s all good; you guys need to make use of all of it.
Ouch!! But seriously, just talk to him about it. He’s gotta know that he’s not lasting a long time. And if you didnt fake it all the time, he will get the hint that your not being satisfied. And if he cares at all, he’ll work on that. If he “ejaculates” too soon, have him pleasure you before you even have sex. Or have him go downtown when he’s done. Even though he ejaculates can he stay hard for a little while longer? Try more foreplay… there’s tons of ways for him to pleasure you better. Play w/ yourself while he’s making love to you…
Good luck, cause that’s got to be frustrating :-/
I have never heard of someone receiving treatment for Premature Ejaculation….it’s a mind thing. He gets so excited that he can’t control his orgasm….it’s normal. Instead of telling him he doesn’t satisfy you show him how to. Give him a hand job…..let him bust his first nut and then have sex…he’ll last longer. It’s that simple.
Don’t say a word, just start pleasing yourself when he walks in the room, or gets in bed. Use your fingers or a vibrator, what ever it takes to satisfy yourself, then worry about him.
You may both open up to more playful love making, and it may just help his “little” problem.
In all marriages it is good to have open communication. You need to tell him so that you both along with a physician can find a solution. You can tell him that you need his sexual attention to last longer. Take it from there and start talking with your husband. Good luck to you!
I wasn’t aware of any treatment for that, but if there is such a thing, you just need to be honest and tell him how you feel. I have no doubt that he wants to satisfy you and that he would be more than willing to do as you ask.
Tell him that you love him but then say that you want to help him so he will continue to make you happy in bed and then tell him that he needs to get help so that you won’t continue to be disatisfied.
I don’t know how. But you need to tell him. If your not happy in bed. It puts a strain on the whole relationship . Sex is important to your health, Physically and mentally.
I don’t think there’s anyway to NOT hurt his feelings, but you need to tell him the truth. Your pleasure is also important, or you’ll seek it elsewhere
Request more foreplay. When he starts to get to the actual act, tell him that you aren’t ready and need a little more pre-performance attention.
Worse comes to worst have him take care of you before you have sex (oral, etc) then it won’t matter how long he takes since you’ve already gotten yours.
you can’t because once you tell him will will think you are cheating so just go ahead cheat or leave him
Just tell him. It could hurt your marriage if you don’t. Just tell him he needs to get help. Don’t flat out say you aren’t satisfied..just tell him you miss longer intimacy…
Best to be upfront and honest. Then encourage him to seek help. When he does make sure he know how much it means to you.
Be as loving and honest as possible. See if he would be willing to see a DR. Then tell him you guys need to go toy shopping!!
if you stop faking it he will understand that he is not satisfying you, and seek help on his own without you telling him
Tell him sex is like a Chinese meal. It’s not over until you both get your cookies.
Grow up they are better things in life. But children will play
just have him give you oral. it feels way better and this way u can get off too